Yup, that's me. Truth be told, the realist in me has been growing for years, yet I refuse to let it capture more than half of me! The evolution from being a whole-hearted optimist to a realist who continually fends off cynicism has transpired mostly due to life experience...and sometimes not my own.
We all do it...our whole lives we've watched how other people live theirs. I don't think I appreciated or feared this more than when I became a mother. Until then, it was all about me, really. Sure, I helped my neighbors, volunteered, supported my family, etc. But mostly, it was all about me and my successful career. And the consequences for my selfishness or self-centered point of view were mine - and heck, they usually produced more income!
The consequences for my decisions, priorities and behavior are now undoubtedly linked to my family...my husband and three daughters. And the simple truth is this - our children need us! We don't need clinical research to prove this theory. How have we gotten so off course in life to ever think that this is not the case? It doesn't take piles of statistics to tell us that parents running full tilt at their own careers while simultaneously raising a family has harmful side effects.
Sure, many of us at one time or another are seduced by the impression that we can juggle it all. But why should we? Who says we should? If the voice answering you is not your own there's a good chance that we have some priority re-arranging to do!
Why should we put anything before the most important job on the planet? We get one shot at raising our kids...there are no "do overs". We are in charge of nurturing our children emotionally, academically, spiritually and pysically. If you share my feelings then get ready to start taking some steps together to strengthen our voice on this matter. We need help and we need mothers and fathers to be courageous enough to say that the way we're herded into raising our children today just won't do. Our over-reaching and demanding careers, our never-ending war with materialism and our lack of rewarding and challenging part-time work must be put to bed!
So, the realist in me says:
Stop watching and mimicking how people that you don't really admire live.
The optimist in me says:
Start finding and supporting families that have figured out how to put their priorities in the right order.
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